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	<title>Motivate Thyself &#187; Growth</title>
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		<title>Is Our Physical Location In The World Beneficial Or Detrimental To Our Personal Growth?</title>
		<link>http://motivatethyself.com/is-our-physical-location-in-the-world-beneficial-or-detrimental-to-our-personal-growth/</link>
		<comments>http://motivatethyself.com/is-our-physical-location-in-the-world-beneficial-or-detrimental-to-our-personal-growth/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 06 Oct 2009 14:18:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Comfort Zone]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[moving]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://motivatethyself.com/?p=3490</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This has been a recurring question for Liz and I over the past few years.  Both being native to our current location, we wonder what our lives would be like were we to pack up and move to the unfamiliar.  Would we find a new adventure just waiting for us to tackle or would we [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-3492" title="location" src="http://74.53.243.29/~phplay/motivatethyself.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/location.jpg" alt="location" width="350" height="234" />This has been a recurring question for Liz and I over the past few years.  Both being native to our current location, we wonder what our lives would be like were we to pack up and move to the unfamiliar.  Would we find a new adventure just waiting for us to tackle or would we crumble under the weight of home sickness?</p>
<h3>First, a flashback&#8230;</h3>
<p>Ever since I can remember, I&#8217;ve been passionate about the big blue sky.  From watching the birds soar up a large, rising thermal, to flying my radio control gliders up that very same thermal.  From biking up to the top of a mountain and feeling even closer to the clouds, to barreling down that very same mountain, pretending I was flying as I descended.</p>
<p>And not just the sky, but every natural thing under it.  From the mountains to the water to the trees and the trails that lead to more beauty, I enjoy God&#8217;s wonderful creation as much as I think humanly possible.  And with this passion comes the desire to enjoy it year round.  And this is one of the downfalls of our current location.<span id="more-3490"></span></p>
<p>We live in a small to medium sized town in Central Virginia called <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlottesville,_Virginia" target="_self">Charlottesville</a>.  Being ranked the #1 place to live the US in 2004 tells you it&#8217;s not a bad spot on the map.  Home of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/University_of_Virginia" target="_self">University of Virginia</a>, Charlottesville is a wonderful, culture rich college town with everything from historical landmarks like <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monticello" target="_self">Monticello</a> to the latest chains like Best Buy and Chili&#8217;s.  C&#8217;ville, as it&#8217;s called by anyone who&#8217;s lived here for more than a few years, has a wonderful balance of a small town feel and a city that&#8217;s &#8216;up-to-code&#8217; with technology and all things 21st century.</p>
<p>The climate is the double edge sword that I was mentioning above.  We get all the seasons and for the most part, a nice taste of each.  Fall is by far the best time, with the dry sunny weather that sits right around 65 degrees.  Long pants and a t-shirt will get you through most Charlottesville Fall afternoons.  Oh, and the leaves change and present the landscape with a wide array of beautiful colors that is unmatched by much of the rest of the Country.</p>
<p>But there&#8217;s a dark spot in this 4 season scenario.  It&#8217;s a 3 month time period from February through April where it&#8217;s just plain depressing.  Many cloudy, rainy days, with temperatures often too warm for snow, yet way too cold for comfort.  It&#8217;s during this time period that I&#8217;m stuck inside and where my cabin fever often gets the best of me.</p>
<p>Why am I telling you all this?  I guess I just want to let you know where I&#8217;m coming from when I tell you that I long to live in a place with mild, dry, sunny whether, where I can enjoy my big blue sky year round.  Where I can rely on bike riding weather from January to December.  And my first question to myself is, &#8220;Is this even a good reason to move?&#8221;</p>
<h3>Back to the present&#8230;</h3>
<p>OK, so now that that&#8217;s out of my system let me get to the main point/question.  As Liz and I keep coming to the front end of this seemingly tired conversation, we keep asking ourselves, &#8220;Are we being held back by our own comfort zones?&#8221;  &#8220;Does living in your home town keep you from pushing the limits because you are constantly met by a comfort that comes from knowing nothing else?&#8221;</p>
<p>Liz went to college for a year and a half and therefore lived a few hours from home for a time and I lived in London, England for 7 months in &#8217;99, but we&#8217;ve known nothing else.  Could we be leaning a little too hard on the crutch of comfort by not wanting to move away from family and friends?  Or is this just our better judgment keeping us from making a big mistake?</p>
<p>I&#8217;m sorry if you came to this blog today looking for some good advice or some delicious food for thought.  This post is more a question mark that has been in the making for the last few years of our lives.  So I&#8217;m just sharing it with you with great interest in your own personal thoughts and/or experiences with the subject.</p>
<h3>So what do you think?</h3>
<p>Can our physical location in the world play a big role in our personal growth?  <strong>Does the climate, community and comfort level have it&#8217;s hand in our ability to mature and make our own waves in the World?</strong> Let us know your thoughts and help Liz in I as we continue to chew on the question, &#8220;To move or not to move?&#8221;</p>
<h3><span style="color: #808080;"><em>Eric Hamm</em></span></h3>
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		</item>
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		<title>Constant Reflection Provides Pinpoint Accuracy</title>
		<link>http://motivatethyself.com/constant-reflection-provides-pinpoint-accuracy/</link>
		<comments>http://motivatethyself.com/constant-reflection-provides-pinpoint-accuracy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 14 Jul 2009 14:41:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Goals]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Productivity]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://motivatethyself.com/?p=3381</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The last 8 weeks have been some of the most stressful, tiring, scary, happy and rewarding weeks of my life.  Our son, Tyson, was born 8 weeks ago to this day and brought with him a new found respect for sleep.  The birth was intense, the sight of a human being that was molded by [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-3383" title="personal_reflection" src="http://74.53.243.29/~phplay/motivatethyself.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/personal_reflection.jpg" alt="personal_reflection" width="350" height="236" />The last 8 weeks have been some of the most stressful, tiring, scary, happy and rewarding weeks of my life.  Our son, Tyson, was born 8 weeks ago to this day and brought with him a new found respect for sleep.  The birth was intense, the sight of a human being that was molded by our very own DNA, amazing, and the shock of having a new born baby, exhausting.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve been out of commission, at least in regards to posting to this blog, but have been blessed with many great bloggers and friends who have helped keep the content flowing by submitting their own great work.  But now it&#8217;s time to get back in the driver&#8217;s seat of Motivate Thyself and share some of the new findings being a new dad has brought about.<span id="more-3381"></span></p>
<h2>The Hamster Wheel Effect</h2>
<p>I&#8217;ve always been an extremely driven person, but ever since Tyson was born I&#8217;ve felt the flames of forward motion grow hotter by the day.  The desire to provide more freedom and flexibility for my growing family have brought about larger visions of success and monetary gain.  Let&#8217;s face it, simplicity and frugality are great, but a super tight budget can be a real pain in the A$$!  There&#8217;s nothing like the new found pressure of higher health insurance costs, diapers galore and a little thing I like to call the hungry baby shriek of death! <img src='http://motivatethyself.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>The problem is, I can easily find myself running on all cylinders, but not getting very far.  Or even worse, getting really far and then realizing I went the wrong direction.  If you&#8217;re anything like me, you shoot first and ask questions later.  I see what I think is a good opportunity and I go for it.  Part of my drive comes from the constant feeling like there are thousands of others going for the same thing and every second I wait to act is one second further from the desired destination; a prize that someone else may obtain at any minute.</p>
<p>Then I find myself feeling like I&#8217;m running in place.  Do you ever feel like you&#8217;re running on a big hamster wheel, breaking  a sweat, but not getting anywhere?  Or maybe a treadmill.  You run to maintain your location, but not make any real progress.  You feel if you stop you will fall way back, out of the running for your goals.</p>
<p>The fact is, this is mostly true.  There ARE thousands of people out there fighting for the same piece of cheese and if we stop pushing ahead we will most certainly loose ground.  But there are some key ingredients here that I want to share; things that I&#8217;ve noticed over the last 8 weeks.</p>
<h2>Learn From Your Past, Don&#8217;t Dwell On It</h2>
<p>Hind site is definitely 20/20 so it&#8217;s easy for us to become back seat drivers to our pasts.  We set out on a new journey for some form of positive future, yet as the months go by we look back, seeing every mistake we made along the way.  &#8220;If I had just done this instead of that I&#8217;d be this much further along.&#8221;  Or, &#8220;Why did I go in <em>that</em> direction? <em> This</em> way would have brought about much greater success!&#8221;</p>
<p>The problem with this kind of thinking is that we not only distract ourselves from making better decisions in the future, but we weigh ourselves down with negativity.  There&#8217;s nothing worse then trying to climb a mountain with a backpack full of unnecessary junk.  The lighter our load, the more capable and clear minded we become.  So never look at your past mistakes with a &#8216;What if?&#8217; mindset.  Instead, learn everything you can from it, assuring you don&#8217;t make the same mistakes further along in your journey, then move on.</p>
<p><strong>Think about it like this&#8230;</strong></p>
<p>A professional sports team will spend just as much time watching old recordings of their past games as they will planing for future ones.  But the coach doesn&#8217;t sit there and say, &#8220;You guys stink!  See here, you did this and that and look what happened!  We lost the game because of you!!&#8221;  No, they will pick apart the actions of each player and determine what was done right and what was done wrong.  Then they figure out a better future action for that player if that specific scenario comes up in future games.</p>
<p><strong>You can do this with more than your own past.</strong></p>
<p>You don&#8217;t have to wait for your own mistakes to learn the best way to accomplish a goal.  Just like a sports team will study other team&#8217;s games, you can learn from the mistakes (and accomplishments) others have made by studying their actions and the results that follow.</p>
<p>The bottom line is, &#8216;When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.&#8217;  But when you fail to execute, figure out what went wrong, make note of this, and move on.</p>
<h2>Constant Reflection Provides Pinpoint Accuracy</h2>
<p>Earlier in this post I mentioned the problem of making up a lot of ground and then realizing your heading was misguided.  The best way to avoid this potentially devastating mistake is to periodically reflect on your current situation and remind yourself of the desired destination.  Try and re-envision the sight, sound, smell and feel of this goal.  Just like hounds need to refresh their scent to keep from losing the lock on their pursuee, so too do we need a constant reminder of exactly what we&#8217;re working so hard to accomplish.  Lose the scent and risk completely missing the mark.</p>
<p><strong>Why do we so often run in place?</strong></p>
<p>I don&#8217;t know about you, but for me it&#8217;s a combination of impatience and fear.</p>
<ul>
<li><strong>Impatience:</strong> I want to reach my goal so badly that I see a &#8216;quick stop and reassessment of the situation&#8217; as just one more thing to slow me down.  Little do I know that the greatest danger to my speed at which I reach my goal is inaccuracy, not lack of brute force motion.  A running back in an American Football game may see the time ticking down to zero, but knows from experience that it&#8217;s constant reassessment and redirection that will give them the greatest opportunity to score, not a blind sprint to the end-zone.</li>
<li><strong>Fear:</strong> Picture yourself in a sail boat race.  Neck and neck with the leader, you and your team put forth all your effort to not lose ground and lose the race.  Along the way you hit some debris which puts a hole in the side of your boat.  You&#8217;re taking on water.  You split up your team, having half maintain the sails and steering while the other half is to bail out the water.  You&#8217;ve successfully prevented your vessel from sinking, but with a split up team you have slowed way down.  Deep down you know that you need to just stop and focus the full force of your team into plugging the hole and then put that same force back into pushing ahead, but you&#8217;re afraid of losing more ground.</li>
</ul>
<p>It&#8217;s this fear of momentarily stopping to reassess the situation that can keep us sailing with a sinking ship.  It&#8217;s this fear that often keeps us from taking much needed vacations or even just a long weekend of reflection.  But just like the sailboat will regain its ground and then some, once repaired, we will almost always come back from our necessary reflection times with a renewed vigor and a sharper vision of the future.</p>
<h2>Final Thoughts</h2>
<p>Coming up on my 1 year blogging anniversary, I&#8217;ve been able to witness many failures and a few exciting accomplishments.  Often filled with 2 steps forward and 2 steps back, I&#8217;ve struggled much of the time.  Yet I&#8217;ve learned so much and have made up much ground.  Not in spite of my mistakes, but because of them.  I&#8217;ve taken what I&#8217;ve learned, reassessed and pushed ahead with greater accuracy and better technique.  I&#8217;m still making mistakes left and right, but I&#8217;m learning from each one.</p>
<p>So I guess the best way to sum up my thoughts would be to say, &#8220;Embrace your imperfections, learn from your mistakes and always keep your eyes focused on the positive possibilities of a brighter future.&#8221;  We&#8217;re all going to screw up along the way, but few make the most of these faults and use them to their future advantage.</p>
<h3>Eric</h3>
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		<title>It&#039;s Never Too Late To Change Your Life</title>
		<link>http://motivatethyself.com/its-never-too-late-to-change-your-life/</link>
		<comments>http://motivatethyself.com/its-never-too-late-to-change-your-life/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 22 Mar 2009 20:42:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[change your life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[personal growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Success]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://motivatethyself.com/?p=2909</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Image courtesy of littledan77 Let me introduce you to Bob.  Bob is a thirty something guy with a loving wife, two kids and a 9 to 5 job that keeps him busy and slightly stressed most of the time.  He lives in a fairly nice, modern home, in a nice, comfortable neighborhood.  With two cars [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h6 style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2914" title="change_your_life" src="http://motivatethyself.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/change_your_life3.jpg" alt="change_your_life" width="500" height="375" /><em>Image courtesy of <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/pressthebuttononthetop/282345258/" target="_self">littledan77</a></em></h6>
<p>Let me introduce you to Bob.  Bob is a thirty something guy with a loving wife, two kids and a 9 to 5 job that keeps him busy and slightly stressed most of the time.  He lives in a fairly nice, modern home, in a nice, comfortable neighborhood.  With two cars in the garage (along with a hefty car payment), a mortgage that snuck its way into his life, and a load of bad buying habits eating up the little bit of savings they have, Bob is not exactly at peace with his situation.  To put it more bluntly, Bob sometimes daydreams about running away to a deserted island where he can hide from all the amassed pressure and responsibility he&#8217;s brought upon himself and his family.  Let&#8217;s just say that Bob&#8217;s a little stressed.<span id="more-2909"></span></p>
<h2>But it wasn&#8217;t always this way&#8230;</h2>
<p>Let&#8217;s go back in time to when Bob was just out of high school and ready to conquer the world.  This was a time in Bob&#8217;s life that the debt had not yet had a chance to pile up and the only one he had to take care of was himself.  He had little stress and a lot of passion behind his dreams of having an amazing career and an even more amazing family to share it with.  Bob was in a place I like to call &#8216;Pre-Paralysis&#8217;.  A place where he had yet to become paralyzed by the pressures of day-to-day life.  A time when the weight on his shoulders had barley even made itself noticeable.  Bob was free and his enthusiasm, unstoppable.  Or so he thought.</p>
<h2>When Bob met Jane</h2>
<p>Bob was blessed with an amazing girlfriend, Jane.  They met at their post high school job at the local grocer and fell in love faster than they could learn how to work the register.  There was no doubt in their minds that they were meant for each other, each one completing the missing half of the other.  Though they knew marriage was not an easy road, they had no doubt it was the necessary next step.  Both Bob and Jane loved children so talk of kids was an exciting regular conversation.  Bob just knew his life was going to be even more amazing than he had imagined.  The thought of taking on the challenges of life, side-by-side with the woman he loved, was enough to give him goosebumps.</p>
<p>As the wedding came closer, Bob and Jane frantically looked for an apartment that they could afford.  They settled on a place that was small, but sufficient.  As they stood there in the empty one roomer, their imaginations began to run wild with thoughts of what it will be like to live on their own as a couple, with no one to stop them from pursuing their passionate dreams.  Bob squeezed Jane&#8217;s hand to confirm their connection as they silently envisioned their future.</p>
<h2>Making bad decisions, one day at a time.</h2>
<p>One of the fist things Bob did after the wedding was buy a new car.  They had needed to take that next step sooner or later, but Jane had questioned the need to buy new.  Blinded by the excitement of a shiny new toy, Bob convinced himself that this was a need and therefore not possibly a mistake.  A month later, when Bob was writing a check for that first car payment, he felt this unfamiliar pressure on his shoulders.  Not knowing what it was, he disregarded it and quickly forgot about its existence.</p>
<p>Now it was Jane&#8217;s turn.  Love of knick knacks, Jane was not a big item buyer.  As excited as Bob had been when he purchased that new car, Jane could equal that enthusiasm when she&#8217;d sign up for her next magazine subscription.  But being a person who greatly enjoyed those small purchases, Jane made many of them.  She&#8217;d sign up for this, and send away for that.  Rarely did Jane make it home from her weekend trip to the mall without bags in both hands.</p>
<h2>IT&#8217;S A GIRL!!!</h2>
<p>Taking that natural next step, Bob and Jane had a beautiful little baby girl.  So excited and happier than ever, they both spread the news as if it were the cure for cancer.  Bob never thought he could feel a joy greater than what he felt when he met Jane, but holding his little blessing in his arms for the very first time sent a sensation through his body like he had never felt before.  This was his daughter, his child.  Bob looked over at Jane and they shared a short silence, communicating a new kind of connection.  They were no longer just a husband and wife, but a mother and father to this beautiful little blessing.</p>
<h2>The Daily Grind</h2>
<p>Let&#8217;s fast forward a few years.  Bob&#8217;s been working as a sales rep for the local yellow pages.  Great at what he does, Bob made a good living off his commission.  The problem was that he had to put in 60 to 80 hours a week to do so and the work was anything but congruent with his original pre-paralysis dreams for success.  When he&#8217;d come home in the evenings, Jane would be exhausted from taking care of their, now, 2 kids as well as making sure dinner was waiting for Bob at the end of his long day.  Their enthusiastic relationship had been diluted by this daily grind and their passion as parents was lacking, to say the least.</p>
<p>The weekends were barely any better.  Bob sat in his office all Saturday morning, writing check after check to cover all their monthly bills.  Not quite sure how they had amassed such a stack of financial responsibility, Bob just turned on his auto pilot and got the job done.  Oh, and remember when I mentioned that first sensation of shoulder weight?  Well, Bob now had a whole pile of bricks to deal with.  It felt like he was wearing a backpack full of concrete, ALL THE TIME!  And let&#8217;s just say that Jane was right their with him, bearing the brunt of this misguided mass.  Whether dealing with her own stresses or feeling Bob&#8217;s financial frustration, she could barely tend to her own needs, let alone those of her children.</p>
<h2>Somethings got to give!</h2>
<p>One day, while working in the yard, Bob felt a crippling pain in stomach.  At first he tried to ignore it, but soon it was evident that this was serious.  So he went inside and asked Jane to take him to the hospital.  Jane was worried about her husband as they drove to the ER.  Not sure what was wrong, they both sat in the waiting room as Bob silently screamed in agony.</p>
<p>They  finally were able to see a doctor who proceeded to run some tests.  Fairly quickly it had become evident that the problem was a large ulcer in Bob&#8217;s stomach.  The doctor prescribed some medicine, but had to ask, &#8220;Have you been under any stress lately?&#8221;  Bob laughed, as if he thought the doctor was joking.  &#8220;Stress?  Of course, isn&#8217;t everyone?&#8221;  The doctor then continued the slightly uncomfortable conversation by agreeing that we all deal with stress in life, but that the level of stress Bob was living with was literally eating away at his insides.  Basically, Bob was bearing too high a dose of dysfunctional lifestyle.  If he continued in this way, this agonizing ulcer will seem like a slight stomach ache compared to the heart attack that awaits.</p>
<p>On the ride home from the hospital Bob and Jane talked about making some changes.  Both completely agreed that they made a wrong turn somewhere early on and that for their own health and happiness they needed to <a href="http://zenhabits.net/2008/10/re-centering-finding-your-way-back-to-the-life-you-meant-to-live/" target="_self">find their way back to sanity</a>.</p>
<p>&#8220;What happened?&#8221;  Bob asked in the tone of a statement.  &#8220;I mean, how did we get here in the first place?&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;All I know is that we went from white to black with so many shades of gray that we never realized the tone of our life had changed.&#8221;  Jane responded as she turned the wheel to re-enter their driveway.</p>
<p>Before the car had come to a complete stop in their garage, Bob made a clear declaration, &#8220;We&#8217;re getting off this ride!&#8221;</p>
<p>Jane smiled.</p>
<p>That night, Bob and Jane slept better than they had in years.  Both at peace with their agreement for drastic change, they felt the shoulder weight lighten, even if only for a moment.</p>
<h2>Undoing The Damage</h2>
<p>The next morning was a beautiful sunny Sunday.  Off from work and well rested, it felt like the day had been hand made for the very purpose of planning their new lives.  Jane made some hot tea and they sat at the dining room table, ready to collaborate on their massive undertaking.  Only armed with a pad of paper and a pen in hand, Bob was ready to get to the bottom of their unexpectedly stressful existence.</p>
<p><strong>This is what they came up with:</strong></p>
<h2>Practical</h2>
<ul>
<li><strong>Bills.</strong> Go through every penny that you pay in bills and separate the wheat from the chaff.  Determine what bills are going toward necessary items/services and which ones are not.  Then cut out EVERY bill that you don&#8217;t absolutely have to have.  Are you subscribing to convenience  on a monthly basis?  Well, decide if that convenience is worth the extra shoulder weight you bare when paying the tab.  ALSO, the bills that are tagged as necessary, be sure they are absolutely necessary and then see if you can&#8217;t reduce their cost in any way possible.</li>
<li><strong>Non-bill payments.</strong> Now it&#8217;s time to look back over the last couple of months.  Where have you spent your money?  Do you buy expensive coffee, a magazine now and again or are you going out to eat because you just don&#8217;t feel like cooking dinner?  While trying to undo the insanity of debt and overspending, it&#8217;s crucial to completely cut the fat and stop the leak all together.  There&#8217;s nothing more frustrating then bailing out a sinking ship without first plugging the hole.</li>
<li><strong>Debt.</strong> One of the biggest culprits in our stressed out lifestyles is the big D word.  Starting out as a common inability to wait, <strong>debt is the love child of impatience and discontentment.</strong> The best thing you can do with your debt is pay it off as soon as you can.  Get that weight off your shoulders TODAY and you&#8217;ll have more energy to take on the world tomorrow.</li>
<li><strong>Sleep.</strong> Without a consistent regimen of <a href="http://motivatethyself.com/download-your-way-to-better-sleep/" target="_self">sound sleep</a> we are crippled by low energy and lack of enthusiasm.  Sleep not only restores our physical strength, but our confidence and clarity of thought.  So if you&#8217;re not getting the sleep you require, get to the bottom of the issue.  Be sure your diet and activity level are consistent with good health.  Analyze your thought process before bed and make sure it&#8217;s not filled with stress and stimulation.  And check out your <a href="http://motivatethyself.com/having-a-routine-that-works-for-you-i-crucial-to-staying-motivated/" target="_self">routine</a> to determine the level of consistency in your sleep patterns.  <strong>Out of all the physical things you can do for yourself, your health and your happiness, a good nights rest should be at the top of your list.</strong></li>
<li><strong>Free time. </strong> How we spend our free time can greatly affect how we feel the rest of the time.  We may not have complete control over what we do when we&#8217;re at work, but our free time is a time where we are free to do what we want.  If you feel you&#8217;re wasting ANY of that time, you will gain shoulder weight just out of feelings of regret.  Our time is precious and we can&#8217;t afford to waste even an OUNCE of it.  <strong>Fill it with fulfilling activity and you will be much more likely to make the most of every other second that comes your way.</strong></li>
</ul>
<h2>Emotional and Psychological</h2>
<ul>
<li><strong>Relationships.</strong> Any relationship we have plays a role in our sanity.  Certainly some more than others, but even the way we treat a person behind the counter at the grocery store has an effect on how we feel about ourselves and our life.  I recently gave a customer support person a hard time because of a misunderstanding of something petty and I was left feeling less than peaceful.  This guy was just trying to help and because he didn&#8217;t have the information I impatiantly wanted, I kind of snapped at him.  A few days later I noticed that every time I worked with the issue I was trying to resolve, I felt a bit of anxiety.  I quickly realized that this bad feeling stemmed from this earlier situation and so I sent this guy an email apologizing for being a jerk.  It may sound like a little thing, but without reconciling even the slightest wrong doing toward another, we are prone to a negativity that will do nothing but eat away at our peace of mind.  And if this one little incidence was that important, how much more important is it that we take care of those who support us on a daily basis.</li>
<li><strong>Addictions.</strong> Whether we know it or not, we ALL have additions.  Some are more obvious than others and they all have differing levels of damage, but the common thread is that we are trying to fill a void in our lives, whether big or small.  Sometimes it&#8217;s just out of a <a href="http://motivatethyself.com/adhd-scratchn-the-itch-with-distraction-part-1/" target="_self">lack of stimulation</a>, while other times it stems from the need to dull a pain inside us.  Some of us have troubling childhood thoughts that bring on bouts of abusive behavior, while others of us may just have a thing for shopping and take it a little too far (as Jane exhibited earlier).  But to deal with these addictions we have to deal with the source of their existence.  You can&#8217;t tell someone with anorexia to JUST EAT!  Their lack of ingestion comes not from a fear of food or their need to control weight, but from some pain in their lives that probably goes way back to a forgotten time.  We need to unravel the mess of memories and expanse of experiences so we can figure out why we do X, Y, or Z.  Once we work through these issues, we can be free to wisely pursue a different path.  But until then, we&#8217;ll be fighting a losing battle.</li>
<li><strong>The Joneses.</strong> An idea that has been beaten to death, I will not kick it while its down, but I will just say that when it comes to other people&#8217;s &#8216;things&#8217;, just remember that they are no happier because of them.  <strong>No object has ever proven to create happiness in an individual and no object ever will.</strong></li>
<li><strong>Past mistakes.</strong> Often times we don&#8217;t realize that it is our past failings that are keeping us from succeeding in the future.  Whether we&#8217;ve lost our confidence or feel discouraged because things didn&#8217;t go the way we&#8217;d hoped, we need to address those things that are always nagging us with negative notions of our ability to reach our goals.  Leave these unchecked and we are doomed to repeat our past.</li>
<li><strong>Insecurities.</strong> With red hair and freckles and the fact that I look about a decade younger than I actually am, I got a lot of flack as a kid.  Constantly being singled out by the current bully of the month, I found myself being beaten down with constant negativity.  Once or twice and you can blow it off as the exception to the rule, but after many times of abuse, you can&#8217;t help but believe it as gospel.  We all carry the weight of insecurity and none of us are spared the inconvenience of a poor decision or two because of it, but we must make sure our lives are not being torn down as a result.  Take some time and look back on your childhood.  Figure out where the negativity came from and how you learned to cope.  We can learn a lot about our bad habits by analyzing our past and we can also find the key to fixing the problem.</li>
</ul>
<h2>Where are Bob and Jane today?</h2>
<p>Still paying down the debt of their past, Bob and Jane are fighting for a more positive future.  Bob is still working long hours, but now with the motivation of digging themselves out of their financial mess.  Jane has not only stopped spending money on things they don&#8217;t need, but is dong everything she can to save on those things they do.  And when Bob gets home from work he not only enjoys time with his family, but has started setting aside time to train for a new position.  He&#8217;s seeking out a role that will allow him to work less time, while still making the money they need to make ends meet and save for the future.  Both Bob and Jane are now learning from experience that one positive action leads to more of the same.  <strong>Each step forward strengthens their stride and reinforces their foundation.</strong></p>
<h2>It&#8217;s not our location, but our heading that matters most.</h2>
<p>People often talk about where they are in life, but I find that it&#8217;s where we&#8217;re going that is most important.  Time is a relentless taskmaster who never listens to reason and just because we&#8217;ve made it to a positive plateau doesn&#8217;t mean that tomorrow won&#8217;t be filled with a barrage of backsliding.  Even more importantly, for those who find themselves in a pit of despair, everything feeling like a failure, I encourage you to focus on your direction, not your current place on the map.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s what&#8217;s so great about life!  We can make our own choices and choose to live the life of greatest fulfillment, for us and those we come in contact with.  We ALL make mistakes and have to deal with the consequences, but that doesn&#8217;t mean we can&#8217;t, AT ANY TIME, decide to take hold of the reigns and steer ourselves toward a more positive future.  Stop focusing on the mistakes you&#8217;ve made and start planning for the future you&#8217;ve always imagined.  Stop listening to the voice that says that you can&#8217;t and start chanting the battle cry for a better future.  <a href="http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/live-deliberately/" target="_self">Stop reacting to life</a> and start challenging yourself to push for greater forward progress.  <strong>You can&#8217;t undo the past, but the present and the future, they are shapeless objects, waiting for your hands to mold them into the life of your choosing.</strong></p>
<h4>Eric<strong><br />
</strong></h4>
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		<title>Live Deliberately: 15 Ways To Stop Life Simply Happening To You</title>
		<link>http://motivatethyself.com/live-deliberately-15-ways-to-stop-life-simply-happening-to-you/</link>
		<comments>http://motivatethyself.com/live-deliberately-15-ways-to-stop-life-simply-happening-to-you/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 28 Sep 2008 07:00:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[live deliberately]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://motivatethyself.com/?p=1133</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Last week I wrote a guest post for Peter over at Pick The Brain: Live Deliberately: 15 Ways To Stop Life Simply Happening To You The basic idea behind the post is that of living each day with a deliberate focus.  I talk about the importance of being pro-active and not just re-active. I lay [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/pasotraspaso/820209045/"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1137" title="splash" src="http://motivatethyself.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/splash1.jpg" alt="" width="450" height="348" /></a></p>
<p>Last week I wrote a guest post for Peter over at <a href="http://www.pickthebrain.com/" target="_self">Pick The Brain</a>:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/live-deliberately/" target="_self">Live Deliberately: 15 Ways To Stop Life Simply Happening To You</a></p>
<p>The basic idea behind the post is that of living each day with a deliberate focus.  I talk about the importance of being pro-active and not just re-active.</p>
<p>I lay out some useful and practical concepts that you might find applicable to your lives.  So feel free to give it a look if you haven&#8217;t already done so.</p>
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		<title>Never Peak!  Always Leave Room For Growth</title>
		<link>http://motivatethyself.com/never-peak-always-leave-room-for-growth/</link>
		<comments>http://motivatethyself.com/never-peak-always-leave-room-for-growth/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 30 Aug 2008 09:44:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Growth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mindset]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[How to reach your goals]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://motivatethyself.com/?p=602</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Image courtesy of Ben I don&#8217;t know if you guys watched any of the Olympics or not, but I certainly enjoyed it.  I am always amazed at the variety of athletes who dedicate their lives for this one specific event.  Having the carrot of a gold medal to fuel their drive.  (Or one for every [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;">
<h5 style="text-align: center;"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-604" title="peak1" src="http://motivatethyself.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/peak11.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="375" /><em>Image courtesy of <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/visbeek/2396165921" target="_self">Ben</a></em></h5>
<p>I don&#8217;t know if you guys watched any of the Olympics or not, but I certainly enjoyed it.  I am always amazed at the variety of athletes who dedicate their lives for this one specific event.  Having the carrot of a gold medal to fuel their drive.  (Or one for every day of the month for Michael Phelps. <img src='http://motivatethyself.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' />  )<span id="more-602"></span></p>
<p>I think what&#8217;s even more amazing is how young these people are.  Many of them are barely into high school.  And yet some of them are nearing the pinnacle of their lives.  I see a 14 year old, standing on the podium, a gold around the neck and the World watching with pride.  They&#8217;ve reached that mountain peak of their life.  They have done something that almost no one ever accomplishes and they will have done it before they even graduate high school.  What a feat!</p>
<p>But then I think to myself, &#8220;Where do they go from here?&#8221;  &#8220;Can they go any higher?&#8221;  It&#8217;s hard not to wonder if the rest of their lives is going to feel &#8220;not good enough&#8221; compared to the amazing accomplishments that they&#8217;ve already achieved.</p>
<p>I know that this is a question that cannot be answered.  It all depends on the individual, what they do with the rest of their lives and how they handle this early success.  You see people like Marry Lou Retton who achieve amazing things so early on and yet continue on to live an amazing life.  People like this are always looking for ways to improve their lives and don&#8217;t care how high the bar is set.  And they also don&#8217;t sit and compare themselves to those around them OR (and this is a big or) to themselves of years past.  They keep their focus on the present and the future.  But even if you go to Mary Lou Retton&#8217;s <a href="http://www.marylouretton.com/" target="_blank">official site</a> you will see much of the focus on what she DID and not what she&#8217;s DOING.  This, for some, may be hindering for their own personal progress.</p>
<p>OK, let me straighten something out.  I am not implying that you strive to reach your goals but that if you are about to actually achieve them, you back off and stop yourself from reaching the finish line.  What I am saying is that you need to make sure that there IS NO FINISH LINE.  Mary Lou Retton is an example of an exceptional gymnast as well as an exceptional person.  But there are many more stories of people who peak at an early age and then spend the rest of their lives living in the past, trying to re-live their &#8216;glory days&#8217;.</p>
<p>I think it&#8217;s very important to not have that kind of finish line.  Once we stop moving forward we will slide back.  There&#8217;s no stationary position in life.  This doesn&#8217;t mean we can never be content with our current situation.  Just that we should always be aware of the next step.  When I am running I find that the moment that I feel the most tired is when I see the finish line that I have designated for myself.  It is in that moment that my muscles ache the most and my breathing becomes the most labored.  The anticipation of being done end up wearing me down.  But sometimes I won&#8217;t pay attention and cross this same line without thinking about it and I&#8217;ll notice how my energy didn&#8217;t drop like is usually does.  I was just cruising right along trying to make it just a little further, not getting ready to stop.</p>
<p>We should always leave ourself room for growth.  There should always be a next step, another goal off in the distance.  We can&#8217;t find ourselves at the peak because the only way to go from there is down.  You might be thinking, &#8220;You&#8217;re kidding, right?  Here you have a motivational blog and you&#8217;re trying to tell us never to try and reach our ultimate goals?&#8221;  What I am saying is that there IS NO ultimate goal.  We can always improve our lives from the state they are in right now.  It&#8217;s just that if we set the bar too high, too early, we will find it hard to keep making progress.  I am not saying you should ever hold back, just keep an idea of the NEXT GOAL in your mind so you won&#8217;t reach a feat and then say to yourself, &#8220;OK, now what?&#8221;</p>
<p>I know there are a lot of people here that are advocates of simple living and being thankful for what you have RIGHT NOW.  I know this because I am one of them.  But what I am saying doesn&#8217;t go against this principle.  Anybody who has ever lived on this Earth, no matter how much they were able to appreciate each moment they were in, to the absolute fullest, were still always in an either forward motion or backward one.  Even if it were just in their heads, they were either making forward progress in their wisdom and knowledge or back sliding.</p>
<p>So I just wanted to encourage you, as you pursue your goals in life, that you really make sure to pace yourself and never see a particular destination as the finish line.  Because it is my opinion that once you stop pursuing, you stop living.</p>
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