EDITOR’S NOTE: This is a guest post by Tess Marshall of The Bold Life.

What do a messy desk, an overcrowded inbox and a “know-it-all” friend have in common?

They are examples of tolerations or situations we put up with or don’t do anything about. Tolerations can be irritating things, minor inconveniences, our own behavior and the behavior of others. They deplete our energy, waste our time and dampen our spirits.

The following are examples and suggestions of tolerations and how to eliminate them.

People Tolerations

We all have one or two family members or friends who arrive late for appointments or cancel at the last minute. If this becomes a habit we can request timeliness rather than become irritated or complain to others.

My running partner Meg and I used to meet at the park every morning. She was always ten to fifteen minutes late. For six months my resentment grew and when I finally told her how I felt I overreacted.

It’s important that we communicate our needs with gentleness and compassion. Relationships are all about communication. I was right in requesting Meg to change her behavior. I was wrong to wait six months, build resentment and overreact.

In the past it has helped me to write down and practice what I want to communicate in difficult situations. Today I teach clients to do the same. It’s easier to remain focused and on track without allowing emotions to interfere.

Communication is more about listening than talking. When I put myself in another’s shoes I become more compassionate and understanding.

Health Tolerations

It’s easy to eat too much junk food, skip exercise and gain weight. This is one way we tolerate our own unhealthy behavior. With discipline, support and commitment we have the power to make healthy changes.

I quit smoking when I was twenty seven. I couldn’t tolerate being out of breath, the smell on my clothes or the taste in my mouth. I also didn’t want to be a bad example for my small daughters.

I began running on an inside track at the university nearby. For six months I ran daily adding another lap weekly. I finally entered my first 10K and finished dead last. However my husband and girls cheered as if I won first place. Because I take 100% responsibility for my health, today remain at my high school weight.

The Economy

The American Psychological Association’s 2007, “Stress in America” survey reports money and work are two of the biggest sources of stress for almost 75% of Americans.

In 2008 our economic times have only gotten worse. We don’t have to dwell on the constant negativity of the media. Instead we can focus on what is right with our lives and maintain positive attitudes.

When my neighbor Bill lost his job and home, depression and anxiety overwhelmed him. His girlfriend convinced him to seek out professional help. Bill currently has a plan for finding new employment and managing his stress.

Everyone needs help some time, when life becomes unmanageable ask for support from your friends, family or a professional. There’s no need to tolerate intense emotional pain.

It’s important to remember we are not alone; everyone is experiencing the same anxieties around economic issues. It’s important for all of us to manage our income and take care of our physical and mental health.

Work Tolerations

I find it expensive to build an online business due to how quickly technology changes and my need to keep up. I recently switched to a less expensive shopping cart and also canceled a membership site I was involved in.

I could have taken this step sooner however I procrastinated and continued to pay the monthly bills. My self talk went something like this, “I need to cancel this, I keep forgetting, I’ll do it tomorrow.”

Ask yourself what expenses you can eliminate in your business. Do we really need one more set of DVDs, a workshop or teleseminar? Reflect on your business expenses. Refuse to be taken in by the next biggest secret or get rich quick scheme.

Another toleration I have is my messy and unorganized office. My self talk goes something like this, “I’ve always been this way, creative people are unorganized or if I straighten up it just happens again.”

It keeps my business from progressing. It’s also self sabotage. My plan is to take a before and after picture of it and post it on my blog. A public commitment is about the only thing I haven’t tried.

It is also important to create a list of priorities in order to avoid wasting time on unimportant tasks. As you finish, cross each task off the list and add what’s left to tomorrow’s list. It’s a discipline that will eliminate procrastination and lead to success.

Other work tolerations can be distractions such as obsessively checking emails, playing solitaire, too much time on Twitter or Facebook. When we become aware of work habits that don’t serve us well and make the necessary changes our profits will increase.

Personal Tolerations

In the dessert of Arizona my car easily becomes dusty. I have regular time and date to maintain it. Doing this allows my environment to be energy giving vs. energy draining.

Because I was one of ten children growing up I had one pair of shoes and hand me down clothes. Today I have more clothes and shoes than I need.

I recently decided I wouldn’t purchase new clothes for a year and would then reevaluate.

I’m determined to wear my clothes until they wear out rather than when I tire of them. It has been three months and I have no desire to go shopping. My new motto is “less is more.”

Home Tolerations

Our fast paced world leaves little time for home projects and repairs. Drawers or doors that stick, leaky pipes or faucets and piles of mail, magazines and papers deplete time and energy if not addressed.

We recently finished cleaning our closets and garage. As we simplify the contents in our home it becomes easier to maintain. Living with less allows us more energy for hobbies, fun and play.

Empower yourself  by taking a personal inventory, creating a list of your tolerations to clean out, weed out or replace in every area of your life: home, personal, friends, family, work and money.

Eliminate them one at a time. You don’t have to eliminate everything at once. You may want to delegate or hire help for bigger projects. The goal is to have a clean and organized home and office space, good relationships with family, co-workers and friends and little or no debt.

Some tolerations will be easy to eliminate. For example, schedule a day to take care of your recycling. Get in the habit of immediately putting away what you use in the kitchen. Clean your desk at the end of every workday.

Other tolerations will be long-term projects. If you have a bad back you may need regular appointments with a chiropractor. If you choose to leave a relationship you may need the support of a therapist or life coach. The gift of letting go of a person who no longer fits our life style is that we make room for someone new.

There are three basic steps: awareness, commitment and action. The benefits of hitting the delete button on tolerances are many. You’ll raise your standard of living and become more effective, focused and balanced.

Life is good when we keep it simple. Life is good when we surround ourselves with people who support us. Life is good when we live and work in a tolerance free living space.

If you enjoyed this post, you can find more great insight by Tess at her blog The Bold Life.