Image courtesy of Hamed Saber
When I look up at the title of this post I can’t help but think, “Secret to happiness? Are you kidding me?” The fact is, there is no secret, something I think we all know. But I do believe that happiness is mostly a choice and the result of our mindset, focus and actions. Last week I wrote about ‘How To Be Happy‘ and laid out my thoughts on things like purpose, values, faith, balance, helping others and so on. I believe I laid out some key thoughts on the subject, but certainly didn’t hit every angle. Thankfully, we have an amazing online community to help fill in the blanks. So to expand on the secret to happiness I will share some of the great comments from last weeks post.
Secret To Happiness Tip #1
Ari Herzog points out the importance of Value as he expands on my statement about ‘spreading the wealth’:
What you call wealth, I call value. Cliche, but it works as a synonym. If something I write, say, or do makes you pause, reflect, and act, then that can only be a happy moment.
Secret To Happiness Tip #2
Janice asked two thought provoking questions:
If there was a shop full of things money can’t buy, what would you get? And what’s stopping you from cutting out the middle man and getting you some of that – or MORE of that – now?!
Secret To Happiness Tip #3
Tess made some great points about the dangers of things that sound too good to be true (and even the dangers of achieving what we think we want):
One thing is for sure the guru’s want everyone’s money, know every trick in the book (and more) to get you to pull out your credit card and buy the latest and the greatest. They will even put their bank statements on their website’s and a zillion testimonials to prove it. But look for the disclaimer and they tell you there is no guarantee. I personally had two friends who went over $150,000 in debt with their credit cards buying program after program at seminars trying to get rich. I said HAD because they have so much shame and embarrassment over it they dropped me as their friend. No they didn’t know each other. So how many hundreds are there listening to the hype at the expensive seminars going in debt trying to find that one niche or secret and lose what’s really important in the end? Way to many… Also the person I took Internet Marketing from is about 250 lbs overweight because he is addicted to his millions and his computer. He doesn’t even leave the house anymore. Hey but he successful as an Internet Marketer!
Secret To Happiness Tip #4
Alex Fayle expands on his expertise as he talks about the importance of living in the moment:
For me as long as I remember to live in the moment, I’m happy. The instant I start sliding into the future and doing things now for some hoped-for later then I drain away my happiness.
Secret To Happiness Tip #5
Dimitar Nikolov talks about two simple, yet key elements of happiness:
The two simple elements of happiness: positive thoughts and positive emotions. If you think about what happiness really is, you’ll see that it means enjoying the moment and being grateful about what you already have. The only way to achieve that is to be positive. I try to make each day count by being happy. So when I wake up, I ask myself “What do I want?”. I start thinking about things I want to achieve today and how great my day will be. I visualize it and feel the great emotions. It’s all about feeling good and blocking out negative thoughts and emotions by concentrating on what you want, not what you don’t.
Secret To Happiness Tip #6
Lynn expands on my Values point with a simple observation that couldn’t be more accurate:
Plus with a clear conscience… you certainly have a better sleep at night
Secret To Happiness Tip #7
Jeremy Day expanded on my point about needing very little wealth to live a comfortable, satisfying life:
I have done a lot of research on the psychology of happiness. Research has shown that beyond making $40,000 a year (or its equivalent in other countries) we don’t get much happier. Research also shows that having MORE options makes us LESS happy. We are better off limiting our options because somehow our brain is wired to appreciate them more. I think you have a lot of great wisdom and insight into this matter. I was a bit skeptical if you could do this subject justice too, but I think you really hit it on the head. Your point about making others happy has a lot of truth to it. Funny thing is I was just thinking today about how I couldn’t be happy because one of my coworkers wasn’t happy. Funny how that works but its true. And having a purpose is very important as well. Life has little meaning until you assign some purpose, no matter how small, to it.
Secret To Happiness Tip #8
Bunny shared an interesting insight (one that I’d love for her to expand on):
I use to think it was all a matter of balance but recently I have changed my mind it is more a matter of harmony.
Secret To Happiness Tip #9
Vincent touches on the fact that our level of income does not equal our level of happiness:
I had read books that said that happiness does not equals to the amount of money we have which I totally agree. I had seen people who are frustrated and angry about their life when they are poor and there are also the same people who are frustrated and angry even when they are rich. This shows that happiness does not equals to how much we have, instead it is a matter of mindset.
Secret To Happiness Tip #10
IvanPerez expands on our need to have purpose in life:
For me the most important thing you talk about here is the purpose. We need a long term goal, something that allows us to be passionate and happy.
Secret To Happiness Tip #11 (Encouraging others)
Hayden Tompkins and Janice Arone just had some kind words for me which I really appreciated. Thanks guys! 
Eric,
Your last point can make a world of difference. My husband is an accountant, crunching numbers all day. We have been married over 37 years and he has never, ever worked outside of his work hours.
It didn’t matter how many phone calls he got during tax season with panicking people at the last minute. He always had friends or clients that lived near by drop off thier stuff on our front porch. They were never allowed to ring the doorbell or call.
Therefore our personal and family time was never interuppted. What a gift he gave myself and his 4 daughters over the years. He had his own practice for 25 years and then sold it. He currently works for a man 20 years younger than he after leaving MI and moving to AZ. He adjusted well and continues to crunch only during working hours. What a guy!
Tess The Bold Life’s last blog post..12 Tips To Be Bold & Set Your Heart On Fire
Yeah, I struggle with this, but am trying to get better. Everyone benefits when there’s a stark contrast between work and non-work life. Eric
Thank you Eric, for consolidating this for us. When I read your post and all the comments, I was amazed at the wealth of information contained therein. Thanks for taking the time to gather together the main points and summarize them. Very effective.
Randi’s last blog post..The Results are In!
Thanks for stopping by and reading all of them. I was just so pleased that so many left in depth comments. It’s one of those simple yet not easy subjects. Eric
Thanks for including my comment in the post, Eric. It’s a great idea to make a summary of all the tips, each one as unique as its author.
Dimitar Nikolov’s last blog post..The Question Method
Sure thing. I really appreciate the great insight on your part. Eric
This was a great read – getting various opinions and perspectives is good learning. I took a look at the original post which I enjoyed very much also. I especially like your comment that by making others happy, you can be happy. It’s so true. The good feeling you can get when you know you put a smile on someone else’s face is amazing. Also, I think that remembering to say ‘thank you’ when someone has made you happy is really important. It keeps the good vibes moving.
I’m glad you enjoyed it. Isn’t it amazing how each perspective picks different points and yet each one is vital to the question at hand. Eric
Thank you Eric for including my comment in the post. I’ve almost finished an article for a guess post. So if you want to read it keep your eyes on my twitter (http://twitter.com/ivanperezs). I will appreciate your comments on it.
Cheers,
Iván.
Sure thing! I’ll keep my eyes out. Looking forward to it! Eric
Hi Eric,
This is a great way to come out with a post. I had never thought of that. Thanks for including my comment.
Cheers
Vincent
Personal Development Blogger
Vincent’s last blog post..Are You Using The 80/20 Principle In Your Life?
Sure thing, Vincent! Yeah, it just came together quite nicely. Eric
Loved the way you put this piece together Eric!
Lots of folk never feel happy because they’ve never defined exactly what it means to them and so are stuck at some default stage. It’s the same with feeling successful. So, here’s another question for you… How do you personally define success, not just in your career()but in your WHOLE life? It’s a biggie. If we don’t know what sucess smells, tastes, looks and sounds like for us, if we don’t sit down and write a vision of what an ideal day would be like, how on earth will we ever know when we’ve achieved success!!
That IS a biggie, Janice! I would say that overall, true success comes when you know that you’re family is provided for, they know you love them unconditionally, no matter what, they return that same love, and you stay true to your values/conscience. Kind of a long answer, but that would probably sum it up for me. Eric
PS…Please get Ajax Comments editor! Missed an’s’ between the brackets in my comment above and it niggles me like a mosquito. Typos will always slip through, especially when you get all your commenters interested and excited like this post did, but that’s one I would have spotted and zapped!
We’ve got it over at The Blueprint, but I just haven’t gone ahead and done it over here. If it plays nice with this particular theme, I’ll probably add, as it seems to be a preferred feature for the reader. Eric
It’s always interesting to hear what happiness is to each individual. I think hope brings happiness. Being able to believe that the future holds positive things for you while living in the present moment can bring a sense of peace that very few people have. This was a great compilation of happiness tips!
Jake’s last blog post..Enhance Your Office, Enhance Your Mood
How true is THAT! That light at the end of the tunnel is no doubt a key ingredient. Eric
Thanks for the tip inclusion!
I love #11 and recently experienced it. My part time job cut back hours due to government funding cuts and instead of telling me to go out and look for more work, my bf said: “We’ll get by. Now you can write more. Something else will come up.”
Encouragement=happiness? For sure!
Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome’s last blog post..Making suckiness good: Lab Rats Week 1
Great tidbit, Alex. It’s always good to know you’ve got the support of the ones you love, no matter what. Eric